Tuesday, August 26, 2008
It's Party Time!
I like to throw parties. My specialty is those murder mystery parties, only I think that the boxed ones are lame so I write them myself. In fact, the Slayer of Bees story from the previous post happened during a murder mystery camping trip that I set up. It was a slasher film murder mystery, and the campground we stayed at had an old church and graveyard on the grounds where we played. I was in charge of the whole thing and even I got a little spooked out!
But one of my problems was always finding enough people to invite, because unfortunately my friends have this tendency to relocate to far-away places. (Is it my deodorant?) Or they lived in far-away places in the first place, like my fabulous critique partner Ami, who has the gall to live in Oklahoma. Funny how you can become so close with people you've never met face-to-face.
But it doesn't really help me with my party problem.
So I've decided that I will throw imaginary parties from here on out. My first party will be the Characters From Books dinner party. Here's the scoop: you can invite five book characters to your dinner party. Who would you choose? My list is long and distinguished:
1. Lord Peter Wimsey, from the Dorothy Sayers' mystery series. Because really, the guy can quote prolifically from classic literature, has a self-deprecating sense of humor, and wears a monocle. And if there's a murder at the party, the killer is totally in for it. Does it get better than that?
2. Miles Vorkosigan, from the Lois McMaster Bujold sci-fi series. Because he's one of the most complex characters I've ever read, and the guy just oozes charisma through the page.
3. C. Thomas Flood, from Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story by Christopher Moore. Because he decides to be a writer and then goes off to the city to starve. Hey, isn't that what writers do? Seriously, though, this book made me laugh my socks off.
4. Granny Weatherwax, from the Discworld series by Terry Pratchett. Also made me laugh my socks off. I need to buy stock in a sock company. But seriously, when I grow up? I wanna be like Granny Weatherwax.
5. Crowley, from Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. Yes, he's a demon, one that didn't quite fall but sauntered vaguely downwards. But when it comes down to it, he's not so demonic after all. Free will, baby. (Aziraphale, his angel counterpart, comes in a close sixth.)
You'll notice that for a YA writer I'm pretty short on the kid lit invites, but that's because I like to cook grownup food for my parties. I refuse to be doomed to a life full of fish sticks and tater tots. (Well, maybe the tater tots.) But I could definitely do a kids' table:
1. Turtle, from The Westing Game. Because she is a shin-kicker extraordinaire. When I was a kid, I wanted to be her when I grew up.
2. Ender, from Ender's Game. Because he's just so damned cool, and I identified with him like I never have with a character before.
3. Jane Jarvis, from Devilish by Maureen Johnson. Because she's not scared by a demon with a cupcake.
4. Meg Murray, from The Wrinkle in Time and sequels. Because we could have been sisters.
5. Witch Baby, from The Weetzie Bat books. Because she's lovable and doesn't know it.
Let's get this party started, eh?