Monday, September 13, 2010

What You've Always Wanted...If Only You Knew What It Was

We're closing in on gift season for the Harris household. We have four birthdays between Halloween and Thanksgiving. All of us have holiday birthdays. The Batson is Halloween. The twins are T-giving. I'm Voting Day.

Quit laughing at me. Voting Day is TOO a holiday! You get stickers!

Anyway, I've been starting to think about the whole gift thing, and I have a few words of wisdom for you. Here are some things NOT to get your loved ones for birthdays or Christmas or whatever gift type holiday you choose to observe.

First, there is this steering wheel desk. Mostly because all of the customer images show terrible car accidents. Who would have thought that driving and doing homework at the same time was DANGEROUS? Not me!

How about something for the fashionista/outdoor person in your life? Nothing will make her happier than these earrings, which are made of real freeze dried squirrel feet. I once had a pair of freeze dried, silver plated seahorse earrings. (No kidding.) What can I say; I'm a water person. But these babies would be perfect for the camper or hiker in your life...until they get attacked by bands of irate pegleg squirrels, that is.

Dismembered feet = always fashionable.


How about something for the techster in your life? You should get them a genuine Russian clock! But wait! See that little label at the top? It says "Time Machine"! This isn't a clock! It's a time machine! And if you open it up, it's a journal too! So you can travel through time and then go, "Oh, wait! I forgot to feed the dog!" and then write it down so you remember when you get back. Assuming you're not devoured by dinosaurs or enslaved by an alien species or something.

I only wish there was space to store my towel.


So what's the most unusual gift you've ever gotten? I need ideas for my family...

10 comments:

Stina Lindenblatt said...

All I say about the ear rings is: ewwwwww!

Claire Dawn said...

A guy once gave me a Cetizen watch. That's right! cEtizen. It's a good thing I'm a nice person. :)

Mariah Irvin said...

I never get unusual gifts, but I always seem to get socks.

Valerie said...

OMG those earrings are scary! And I just spent way too much time looking at those accident pictures. Steering wheel desk, wow. Just wow.

K.C. Shaw said...

Eek, I remember the (short-lived) fad of those dried-and-gold-plated-seahorses jewelry! A friend of mine had a seahorse pendant for a necklace. I was simulataneously fascinated and repelled.

The squirrel earrings just repel me.

Shannon O'Donnell said...

OMG! Those earrings are unbelievable. Do people actually buy/wear those things?! *shudder* I once received a wooden moose paper towel holder with matching napkin rings - oh, so ugly. Painfully ugly. And I like Moose!

Jessica said...

Love the comment about the towel! :P And those earrings are definitely a one-of-a-kind, who I'm not really sure...gift!

Carolyn V. said...

Wow, those are the creepiest earrings ever.

The weirdest gift was a roll of t-p.

Anonymous said...

Slayer can get you those earrings, and you can get him a matching bottle of the most alcoholic beer in the world!

It IS $765 bucks a bottle, though, so you might want make that count for a couple holidays worth of presents for him.

lulilut said...

Feetsies for the fashionista! I wonder what they did with the rest? A tail necklace!