Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Apparently, I'm Dead

I died today.

I have one of those Google alert thingies, because I like knowing when people talk about me. Actually, scratch that. I like knowing when people say nice things about me. I think there should be a "nice things only" button on Google. Not that anyone has said anything particularly nasty about me to date, but I'm going to be a published author, and I think it's inevitable that someone somewhere is eventually going to call all the barf jokes in my book 'childish,' and then I will sit here and haughtily inform my computer that I'm NOT childish, and vomiting is a universal experience that we all share, young and old. And if they didn't have such a stick up their hoo hoo, maybe they'd understand that.

Of course, after that, I'll realize that I'm yelling at my computer, and that's pretty childish. So I'll have to concede the point.

Either way, that button would be awfully handy. Could you work on that Google? I'll use it when I'm not dead any more.

I have to admit that it was weird to get a Google alert about my own obituary. I read it. Partly because I know my friends ARE strange enough to submit my obit without my knowledge, and I think that would be pretty funny. (And childish!) And part of it is because I wanted to know more about the me that died. And then I started thinking about when I'm 90 and eventually go up to the big Zombieland in the sky, and some other Carrie Harris gets a Google Alert that their obituary is up, and how embarrassed they'll be to have the same name as a lunatic like me. I'm preemptively sorry, Carrie. Your name has a long tradition of childishness and zombie-related nonsense. I hope you'll carry on the tradition proudly. Lots of caffeine is very helpful in this pursuit.

Yeah, I think I might finish my book today, tomorrow at the latest. It's making me a little slappy. Can you tell?

For a dead chick, I'm awfully spry.

15 comments:

Candice said...

I like it when your slappy. I makes me laugh! Not that you dying is anything to joke about.

Candice said...

Oh, I meant you're slappy. As in YOU ARE. I really have no idea who your slappy is or if you even have a slappy.

Keri Mikulski said...

Yikes...

This happened to my uncle two weeks ago. Creepy.

K.C. Shaw said...

At least your alert was interesting. My non-me alerts are all about a rather popular soccer player in Kansas City whose last name is Shaw.

Woot on almost finishing the book! Go go go!

Natalie Whipple said...

That's a little creepy. I think it's cool and respectful that you read it.

Solvang Sherrie said...

How bizarre!
Was it really for YOU or for someone else with your name?

Aaron Polson said...

Wow. I haven't died yet. I've done lots of other things (according to Google) that I don't remember, but dying...never.

Cate Gardner said...

I had an alert a few weeks ago that named me and my nephew... Gulped several times.

sraasch said...

*cue Twilight zone music*

Weird. Though, this is the sort of thing that seems oddly appropriate to happen around Halloween.

Mariah Irvin said...

If you Google Image my name, you'll see pictures of gravestones. Seriously.

Finish that book!

Danyelle said...

*grin*

Why weren't we invited to the funeral? Oh, wait. Zombies don't have funerals, do they?

ElanaJ said...

I have a google alert on my name too, but I'm not sure it works. I never get anything, and then I'll read blogs and stuff with my name in them... so yeah.

Sorry you died.

Glad you're going to finish your book soon! Woot!

Natalie L. Sin said...

So this is how the zombie take over begins...

Kelly said...

How old did the other Carrie live to be?
Congrats on almost being finished. Don't worry, be slappy!

Masonian said...

I hope you like brains.