Monday, October 5, 2009

I'm Not Only a Judge, I'm Also a Political Commentator!

Whee! I'm a judge in the Cybils! This astounds me because it seems to indicate that someone somewhere thinks that I know what I'm talking about. Either that, or I'm the victim of a very elaborate practical joke. If this is a practical joke and you are the perpetrator, I simultaneously hate you and am impressed by you.

Anyway, this won't change much in the regular day-to-day business here at The Wonder That Is My Blog, except that I'm going to do a better job of keeping up with haiku reviews, and I'll be pairing them with longer reviews of Cybil-nominated books. But otherwise, you can expect the usual from me: all nonsense, all the time.

I need a t-shirt that says that.

Actually, I also need this t-shirt. See, I think I need to start a very important political movement. I'm talking big here, people. Marches on Washington big. Political rallies big.

Secret handshake big.

My goal is simple; my question is clear: Why do vampires get all the sparkles?

Because really, don't zombies deserve a little sparkle too? And Yeti. Poor sparkle-impaired Yeti. The tentacled monster that lives under your bed might be scary, but maybe that's because he needs a little lovin. Some sparkles would go a long way toward making him attractive to the opposite sex. I bet that Jason would have been a lot nicer to those kids at the camp if he was sparkly.

As writers, we have a responsibility to get our readers to think about the world they live in. We need to portray characters of different races and beliefs, to show the world in all its multifaceted, wonky glory. Our characters are role models. And right now, we've provided ample role models for undead, marble-skinned, sparkly vampires with angelic faces and perfectly tousled hair.

But the sparkly mutant wombats of this world are left hanging. And really, what's the fairness in that? Sparkles for everyone, that's what I say!

19 comments:

Cate Gardner said...

Congratulations, Carrie. Use your powers for good.

Mariah Irvin said...

Yay for being a judge!

I think you're the best person to spread the sparkle!

K.C. Shaw said...

I love that T-shirt. And I'm frightened by the thought of you in a position of ULTIMATE POWER. Then again, I'm sure you'll only use your powers for good and sparkles.

Jamie Eyberg said...

congrats! couldn't have happened to a more deserving person.

Aaron Polson said...

I bow to the judgement of your politically charged sparkles.

storyqueen said...

I was a Disneyland with my kids last night and for some reason, whenever my middle daughter stood underneath the strange yellow lights outside of Space Mountain, the entire right side of her face sparkled.

She's obviously have sparkly vampire.

True but strange.

Alan W. Davidson said...

Well done, Carrie. The creators of the shirt surely had you in mind!

Word Verification: perly

Kelly said...

Wow! That is awesome!

Bryan B. said...

The t-shirt is awesome.

Natalie Whipple said...

This is a serious issue. We especially need to have sympathy for the sparkly ninja. It makes his job very hard, you know.

Lee Wind said...

Hey, this should be fun! And the t-shirt I want would quote you "Why Do Vampires Get All The Sparkles?"
Namaste,
Lee

Carrie Harris said...

Thanks, everybody! And Lee, I think I may have to make that t-shirt!

Horror Girl said...

The sparkle problem could easily be fixed with a little body glitter! A handful of glitter and voila! a beautiful undead sparkling zombie!

Natalie L. Sin said...

Sparkle blob!

Nicole said...

Carrie Harris for Prez?

With political positions like that, I think the nation would vote for you over any other political candidate.

SPARKLES FOR EVERYONE!

Lisa and Laura said...

Congrats! Can't wait to read more of your reviews!

abrokenlaptop said...

Wait, what? Wombats? Are you talking about my writer's group??

Congrats, Carrie! You'll do a faaaaantastic job!

-Mercedes

Solvang Sherrie said...

Way cool!

Stephanie Perkins said...

SO freaking awesome you're a Cybils judge this year! Congratulations!!

(And good luck, too — Laini did it last year and it appeared to be a looooot of reading, even for a reader. Tee hee!)