Carrie Harris | Young Adult Author

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Yep. I'm the Bimbo.

I was reading this post the other day on Lady Glamis' blog about how she usually has a romantic affair with her books but was contemplating a divorce. From her current book, sillies, not from her lovely sword-wielding husband.

Anyway, it got me to thinking. So many people talk about falling in love with their books, like writing a book is like a romcom. I don't do that. My relationship with my books is more like a horror film. Actually, that's not entirely accurate: I write like a slasher film. I'm talking about the kind of book in which everyone gets chopped up into kibble except the one cheerleader, who decides to go out searching for her friends in the dead of night even though there's so much blood on the floor that no one could ever survive, and she's wearing only a baby doll nightie and no shoes. In the woods. As she's going out the door, she remembers that there's a bad guy out there and decides she'd better arm herself. With a ruler.

And you're sitting there on the couch (I always watch these kinds of movies on the couch because then I can heckle them. Loudly.) yelling, "Go back into the cabin, you bimbo! What're you going to do with a RULER? Measure the guy before he kills you? Put some fricking clothes on and call the police!" Only of course she doesn't, and then she ends up standing in the middle of a big field, looking around wildly for the bad guy who is standing right behind her, waving his big pointy knife around to get her attention.

Yeah, that's what my writing process is like. And in case you haven't figured it out, I'm the bimbo.

I keep getting myself into these seemingly unsolvable corners in my mannie. Outlining doesn't solve this problem, because I inevitably come up with a really kewl idea that totally blows the whole outline out of the water, so the whole thing is just a waste of time. Anyway, I end up blindly groping around for a solution kind of like the bimbo, only with more appropriate clothing. The solution, of course, is often blazingly obvious. It's not standing behind me waving around a big pointy knife, but it might as well be.

So much for feeling superior to the bimbo. I promise not to heckle you any more. Much.

18 comments:

beth said...

LOL!!! Don't worry, I'm a bimbo, too! :)

Aaron Polson said...

But bimbos have more fun, right? That's what I've heard, at least.

Mariah Irvin said...

I think defending yourself with a ruler is pretty pointless, but it's not like it's a fluffy pillow.

Although those can become pretty deadly...and feathery...

Christina Farley said...

Rulers are handy from time to time. At least she didn't go running into the night with her bag of chocolates like I so may be inclined to do.

Catherine J Gardner said...

I've dedicated my life to being a bimbo, why stop now. :)

Vivi Alden said...

Ah, yes. I, too, end up writing myself into a corner, and all I have is a butter knife to defend myself. It may FEEL like a romantic affair at the beginning, but it always turns into Fright Night. Glad I'm not alone in this. Bimbos unite!!

K.C. Shaw said...

Since I write fantasy, I found myself automatically thinking, "Maybe it's the legendary Ruler of King Foot, which glows blue in the presence of orcs and serial killers."

I suspect I'm that bimbo too, only I believe absolutely in the magical powers of my ruler.

Jamie Eyberg said...

I prefer to think that I go bear hunting with a BB gun.

Kelly said...

I just can't watch those movies! My hubby watched the remake of My Bloody Valentine (alone, I don't have time for slasher movies!) and I saw a few choice parts, one being a completely naked woman running outside from a deranged lunatic! Those lunatics always seem to find the ladies unclothed! Anyway, I'm a writing my first chapter book and I do really like my main character. I find myself smiling as I write. Ahhhh, is it love?

Horror Girl said...

at least your the bimbo who makes it to the end (or almost). I'd be the bimbo who dies in the first five minutes as a warning to the other bimbos.

Natalie said...

I never thought about it like that, but I guess I'm the bimbo too. Hasn't done me much good lately, sigh.

Big Plain V said...

Funny as hell, Carrie. And if the bimbo was calm enough, she could give the bad guy a wicked snap with the ruler.

It wouldn't kill him, but she'd think he was dead, and then when she looked back again... his body would of course be gone.

PJ Hoover said...

Unsolvable corners are the best place to be, right, Carrie, because it keeps readers on their toes.
I need to learn to be more of a bimbo.

Natalie L. Sin said...

Now, now, its not like you took a shower will the psychotic killer was loose.

Ello said...

What? A ninja bimbo? he he!

Lady Glamis said...

Well, I've finally discovered that I don't have to love my work to make it good. So that's good.

You're not a bimbo. You're unique and you write the way you write. So more awesome kudos to you! Just learn to see the obvious. That is so much easier said than done. *sigh*

BT said...

Waves hand in meek manner - Yep - I'm a himbo.

abrokenlaptop said...

Well, I suggest that we have a bimbo party, braiding each other's hair and scurrying around the forest in our fluffy kitten-heeled mules!

 


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