Normally, I'm so organized. Normally, I'm done with Christmas shopping by now, or at least so close to done that I can gloat. Not this year.
But I figured that at the least, I could turn my Christmas foot-draggery into something that would work for YOU, my loving readers. (Awwww.) So here are a few brilliant ideas for that hard-to-please person on your list.
Forget the Snuggie (aka the WTF Blanket). Have you bought a Girlfriend Lap Pillow for that special someone on your list? Because they're made to feel like real legs, and nothing says I-love-you like dismembered legs.
Or show the woman you love how much you care by having someone make a Barbie that looks like her... if she was undead.
Of course, you all know that I really want one.
If you're really stuck, go for the default and buy some clothes. Like this Vampirism does not make stalking attractive t-shirt. Or if you're buying for someone with a serious masochistic streak, try the Pressure Points: A Guide to Killing Me shirt.
Yeah, I want those too.
If you're looking for something bigger, why not go for furniture? Show that special someone how much they mean to you. Buy them a chair that may at any time decide to eat them.
Or if you don't like that, how about a chair made out of stuffed panda bears?
The best part about this list is that I'm now done Christmas shopping. Slayer, I hope you like pandas.