Thursday, September 29, 2011

SLJ...and Taking Applications for Enemies

I'm happy to report that the lovely people at School Library Journal said that BAD TASTE IN BOYS is "filled with light humor along with a silly, gory edge that will make readers laugh, rather than cringe." I love you, SLJ people! I pelt you with glitter and happy noises.

Anyway. There are developments behind the scenes, people. And one of those developments emailed me the other day to ask if I had any surprising mortal enemies. I was very embarrassed to confess that I don't! I NEED SURPRISING MORTAL ENEMIES. I am now taking applications in the comments. Wouldn't you like to be able to say, "Yeah, I'm the surprising mortal enemy of a crazed YA writer"?

I know I would. I wonder if I could be my OWN surprising mortal enemy...

Ack! Blogger posted this early. Which might have something to do with the fact that I pushed the button telling it to post instead of saving the draft, but let's blame it on Blogger anyway.

So. I will select one surprising mortal enemy from the comments, who gets bragging rights AND a signed copy of BAD TASTE IN BOYS. Make me laugh and it could be you. I'll choose the winner on October 5th, shortly before I leave for a REAL WRITING RETREAT. Which is awesome.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Cause and Effect and Trouser Bacon

A little while ago (ie, yesterday), this happened:

I got an email from a friend that said some things, and then right at the end (and totally unrelated, I might add), he said, "I reserve the right to make a bacon hat."

This struck me as a genius statement. So I tweeted.

Oh, and today, I got an email that said, "I reserve the right to make a bacon hat." Don't we all, unnamed emailing person? DON'T WE ALL???
Sep 22 via webFavoriteRetweetReply

People read my tweet, which still astounds me. And then Lish McBride, who wrote one of the funniest books in existence--HOLD ME CLOSER, NECROMANCER--sent me a video of a guy who wears a bacon dress and puts bacon down his pants, because she GETS ME.

So then we started ranting about trouser bacon, and how I wanted a shirt that says, "You should never eat trouser bacon," and then Laini Taylor, who I WILL MEET LIVE AND IN PERSON NEXT WEEK, jumps into the conversation, and at the end of the day, I think we might have pitched my agent with an anthology of stories...all about trouser bacon. Which I, personally, would buy.

Wouldn't you? I would very much like to see what Laini and Lish would do in the trouser bacon genre.

Monday, September 19, 2011

The Renn Faire and Monty Python References and...Slasher Film Cheerleaders?!?

A few weeks ago, I went to the Renaissance Faire with a bunch of friends. It's a tradition that we go every Labor Day, and this year was just plain silly fun. For starters, my son's battle axe was stolen by Jack Sparrow. I even have pictoral proof.

Give it back, or I'll bite your kneecaps off! I've given Jedi bloody noses before. You don't want to mess with me.

And I'm not kidding about that Jedi thing, either. I pity the bully that tries to pick on my kid. I REALLY pity the one that tries to pick on his sisters.

Things like that always seem to happen to our group. One year, one of the guys from the ninja dojo got picked to go up on stage with the belly dancers. The kicker is that he dated a belly dancer at one point, and he really went to town with the hip swivels. So of course we threw cash at him. I may have hit him between the eyes with a quarter, but I'll never admit it in public.

And if you'll reread that sentence, you'll notice that I really didn't admit it. I admitted the POSSIBILITY, that's all.

The other awesome thing that happened at the Faire is that we started talking HALLOWEEN. I LOVE HALLOWEEN! I forced my kid to be born three days in advance just so it could be on Halloween. (Okay, so that's a slight exaggeration. But I would have done it if I could have.) And this year, I really want to be the Kelda from Terry Prachett's Tiffany Aching books. And then have a bunch of the guys be Nac Mac Feegle, so I could fold my arms and tap my feet and have them yell, "WAILY WAILY WAILY!"

We practiced this at the Faire, and it was fun. I suggest you recruit someone to do the wailing and try it yourself.

I'm thinking this Halloween is going to be EPIC. Even epicker than the time I dressed up as the slasher film cheerleader and a little old couple took one look at me and drove off the road.

Have you started thinking Halloween yet?

Oh, and my agent will probably be very pleased to know that I think I've settled on a plot for my fifth book, and it will be set at a Renn Faire. Of course, I have to finish book FOUR before I can get that far.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Dystopian, Gametastic, and Crazeballs. How Have YOU Been?

Sorry to have been gone so long. It's been a crazy couple of days full of things that start with the letter S. Like SUCK. SUCK SUCK SUCKETY SUCK. But the suck is sublimating now, and that's just super.

So this week, I'm working on a shorter piece that I'm hoping to show you before November 2012, because that's a hecka long time for both of us to wait. Although this may be somewhat more difficult because Slayer just gave me a copy of HAMMERED by Kevin Hearne, and those books are the awesome on top of the cake. And it's not the kind of awesome that dyes your tongue blue and tastes vaguely like the inside of a congealed Twinkie. The series is awesome, and you should read it.

And then you should read READY PLAYER ONE by Ernest Cline, who actually HAS A DELOREAN. It doesn't get much cooler than that. And it's a dystopian, gametastic, crazeballs, 80's reference-laden book of total awesomeness. It's instantly rocketed up into my favorite books of all time.

What have you been reading?

Friday, September 9, 2011

Come See Me This Weekend!

Whatcha doing this weekend? If you're anywhere near Southeast Michigan, come and see me at the Kerrytown Bookfest! I'll be on a science-fiction and fantasy panel with Jim Freaking Hines, Steve Piziks, and David Erik Nelson. It's Sunday the 11th at 3 PM in the main tent.

After the panel, I'll be signing books. AND...if you come to the event, let me know that you read my blog, and I will answer one insider info question about upcoming Grable books. (Although I retain veto power because I know one of you smartypants will ask to know the entire plot of the next book in detail. And then I will laugh.) Normally, I refuse to answer these things, so you will KNOW THINGS. And you will be able to TAUNT PEOPLE WITH YOUR KNOWLEDGE.

Hope to see you there!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Back to School

Yesterday was my son's first day of school, and today, my daughters go. And of course, every time I bring this up, people ask me what I'm going to do with all the extra time. In my quest to appear semi-normal, I usually say things like sleep, work, or PARTY AT MY HOUSE. But really? I'll be doing one of these things:
  1. Learn how to crochet the Exorcist playset. Because the power of yarn DOES compel me.
  2. Researching what happens when you lock someone in a porta potty and tip it over, otherwise known as STARTING BOOK FOUR.
  3. Going to a roller derby practice and trying desperately to resist the urge to try out.
  4. Designing a time machine so that I don't have to do the second half of number 3.
  5. Selling the time machine on the black market so I don't have to do ANYTHING.
  6. Sleep a little, because let's be realistic here. It's gonna happen.

What are you up to these days?