Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Blog Tour - Altercation

I'm so happy to be participating in Tamara Hart Heiner's blog tour for her new book, ALTERCATION! It's out now, so you don't even have to wait to get your copy. I wish I could take credit for this convenience, but...oh heck. I'll totally take credit for it.

Anyway, here's a little bit about the book!
The FBI promises Jacinta Rivera and her friends that they are safe. Jaci wants desperately to believe them but weeks of hiding from their kidnapper, alias "The Hand", have left her wary. Hidden from the public eye in an FBI safe house, Jaci must reconcile both the mysterious disappearance of her father and the murder of her best friend.

A betrayal lands Jaci back in the grasp of The Hand, shattering her ability to trust and leaving her to wonder if she will ever piece together her broken life.
Uber cool, right? I'm all about a good suspense book, and I hope it doesn't sound too morbid when I say that I have contingency plans in the event of a kidnapping, and I've actually duct taped myself to a chair and tried to get out (it was research for a book, but also is handy in case I ever need to escape), and I've thought long and hard about potential kidnappers. Because really, if I'm going to be kidnapped, I want the BEST kidnapper possible.

(Side note: I am a smartass. Please don't kidnap me. I'm also married to a ninja, so it's really in your best interests to not take me seriously.)

I mean, honestly? The Hand is SCARY. I would really prefer to be kidnapped by one of these guys.

1. Richard Simmons. I figure if Richard is my kidnapper, I'll get lots of exercise and maybe take off the last 10 pounds I ought to lose. And it's really hard to be afraid of a guy with that hair and short shorts, so as far as kidnappings go, it shouldn't be too stressful. Provided no vegetables are involved.

2. Darth Vader. Evidence suggests that if you're kidnapped by Darth Vader, two cute guys will disguise themselves in stormtrooper outfits and come to rescue you. And sure, you'll smooch your brother, but you ultimately end up with Indiana Jones! I am totally down with any kidnap scenario that ends with dating Indy.

3. Michael Symon. I'm a huge Food Network junkie, and it seems to me that being kidnapped by Mike Symon would be like HIM: Eat this meat, prisoner! ME: Okay! The only problem would be that after I was kidnapped by him, I'd need to be kidnapped by Richard again.

4. Ninjas. I'm married to one, so I figure the Ninja Code of Not Hurting Other Ninjas' Wives will keep me safe. Besides, I think this sign is awesome, and I want to give people the opportunity to carry one.

And those are my preferred kidnappers! Congrats to Tamara on her book, and thanks so much for visiting me today! In honor of the book release, THERE ARE PRIZES. You can learn all the relevant deets on Tamara's blog, but the short version is that commenting below enters you to win an ebook of PERILOUS or ALTERCATION, so let me know who YOU'D like to be kidnapped by! And the grand prize is pretty awesome, so check out that blog entry to win.


LM Preston said...

I love it already! Thanks for telling us!

Liesel K. Hill said...

Great post! It made me chuckle! :D

Beth S. said...

Yes, I will have Michael Symon kidnap me anytime. Though, maybe he'll use that maniacal laugh to sound like a nefarious kidnapper, but we really know that as long as you're not a vegetarian, you'll be OK as his captive.

And can I just say that I had to stifle a laugh in the middle of my class when I read that you duct taped yourself to a chair for research purposes. The things we do for our craft. :)

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

You're so awesome! Thanks for having me!

Tiny T said...

I would have Darth Vader kidnap me for the same reasons you mentioned. How can anyone resist the Indy?! Oh and ninjas since I am also married to one. ;)