Friday, February 6, 2009

Vampire, Werewolf, or Zombie - The Literary Version

Okay, it's time for another game of Vampire, Werewolf, or Zombie. For those of you who haven't played before, it's simple. I give you three people. You tell me which one is the vampire, which one is the werewolf, and which one is the zombie. And then I make fun of you because you're wrong.

Erk. Wait. That last part isn't true. I mean, I might laugh a little on the inside, but I would never make fun of you. I'm too busy making fun of myself.

I really need to get better at this whole multitasking thing.

So, today's game is the literary version of vampire, werewolf, or zombie. Because Hollywood ain't the only place that's full of supernatural beasties. And really, do you think that a normal human could really have written "Gone with the Wind"? Rhett was a vampire, and so was Margaret Mitchell.

Trust me. I have sources.

So here's your challenge. Out of the following list of people, who is the vampire, who is the werewolf, and who is the zombie? Your choices are:

William Shakespeare
Jane Austen
You

That's right. You! Most of the people who read The Wonder That Is My Blog are bookish types, either in the reading or writing category. And really, I do this because it may be the only time in your life that you are put on a list with Shakespeare and Austen. Unless that list is "People Who Have Two Hands," in which case you're on the list with them and a few trillion other blokes. So I'm really doing it as a public service to you. Don't get all huffy about it, or I'll send the ninjas after you.

So bring on those answers. Will you doom yourself to an eternity of blood-drinking, years of superfluous hair, or a bunch of lurching and moaning? And don't the options sound great when I put them that way?

16 comments:

Jamie Eyberg said...

Shakespeare- Vampire. He is just way too cool to be anything else.

Austin- Werewolf. God only knows what happened to her when the full moon rose.

Me- Zombie. I don't get enough sleep around here to be anything but that.

Captain Hook said...

I agree with Jamie that Shakespeare is a vampire, and for the same reason.

Austen: Zombie because only the dead could possibly be so boring.

Me: Werewolf

Hanna Banana said...

Hmm...

Shakespeare- The vampire

Jane- The werewolf

Me- I am so the Zombie. I love brains!!

Aaron Polson said...

And I quote the Simpsons:

"Is this the end of Zombie Shakespeare?"

Shakes: Zombie
Austin: Vampire
Me: Werewolf (I forgot to shave today, too)

Cate Gardner said...

Shakespeare - Vampire (ask Marlowe).

Jane Austen - Werewolf (I've seen pictures).

Me - duh! Zombie.

Scillius Maximus said...

Shakespeare - Zombie. Don't get me wrong. The Bard is way WAY cool (I even have the bible i.e. The Complete Works). But just look at Hamlet, King Lear, and Titus Andronicus: Men and woman dropping dead faster then Carrie can get to the Tom Robbins/Neil Gaiman/Bruce Campbell combo autograph booth. Dead coming back from the Grave. Body part flying EVERYWHERE. There's just too much of a Z-factor going on here.

Austin - Vampire. Just look at the twilight series, eh?

Me: Hmm let's see -
Ninja = Cuisinart in Black Pajamas
Werewolf = Cuisinart in Fur Coat

It's just a matter of changing outfits :-) -- Werewolf

Michelle D. Argyle said...

Yay! I'm on the list! Why, thank you. :)

Shakespeare - Vampire. Perhaps all the blood he sucked gave him more genius. Because he really is genius. Or at least his work is...

Austen - Zombie. I don't think she slept much, if at all, worrying whether or not she'd ever find that perfect man.

Me: Werewolf. Because it's the one that's left, and I'm sure that I look like one when I get angry. I'm always making my husband run in the opposite direction.

Suzanne Casamento said...

Boy, this is tuffy. I'm going to have to say that Shakespeare is the werewolf. Jane Austen the zombie and I'm the vampire.

What can I say? Tru Blood makes it look so sexy...

Elizabeth said...

Well, I'll take the cake here and leave the other guys in the dust because I am all three. A vampire because I love the dark. I love moody weather which they all seem to love too. I also find biting someone's neck somehow sexy, but will deny it if you tell anyone.
Werewolf is also me b/c I have lots of hair and during certain phases of my cycle I am known to turn into a beast. And zombie, yes, a zombie of a mother sometimes. Hey, is mummy like a zombie? SOmetimes I don't get enough sleep and scare my family with my rough edges.

Mariah Irvin said...

Shakespeare is definitely the vampire...all the killing in his plays was not for literary drama.

Austen is the werewolf...maybe she never married because of the hair/howling at the moon issue.

I guess that makes me a zombie...that explains the huge bags under my eyes and incomprehensible babbling. Or maybe that's just my all my AP classes...

Jameson T. Caine said...

William Shakespeare: Zombie, because he still lives to this day, laughing maniacally at what his legacy has meant for high school students everywhere. I actually heard him snickering outside my classroom when it was my turn to recite from memory the "friends, Romans, countryman" speech. B******!

Jane Austen: Vampire. Isn't it obvious?

Me: I know that should leave me as the werewolf, but I am actually a MUMMY. I have nothing new to wear, my joints creak when I move, my skin is beyond dry and all I do is sit around collecting dust.

Brenda said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Brenda said...

Shakespeare - the Zombie - he does have a lot of people dying in his stories...

Austin - the Vampire - she was pretty pale in color...

Me - Werewolf - I haven't had time to shave my legs in about a week...yikes! I'm so glad its pants weather and Hubs and I have both been too tired to care...grin...

I'm going to go shave my legs now...

Lina said...

I think Shakespears the zombie and Austen the vampire witch means I must be the werewolf, which does kind of suck beacause I'd rather be the vampire but Jane so beat me to it.

Kimbra Kasch said...

Shake: Vampire, his plays are all full of blood

Austin: Zombie

Me: Werewolf - you don't want to be around me when the tides are effected

Anonymous said...

Lina, are you saying Jane Austen is a vampire witch? Interesting combination.