I'm sick again, so today's entry is going to be brief but poignant.
Quit laughing. I could be poignant if I wanted to.
I've learned a lot about life from commercials. For example, thanks to commercials, I know that people who enjoy doing active things like volleyball, hiking, and walks on the beach inevitably have herpes. I know that men with erectile dysfunction often show other symptoms like problems with the plumbing in their kitchen, which strikes me as very fitting. I know that unhappiness with things like your birth control, mode of transportation, or life in general can suck all the color out of your body and clothing, turning you into a black and white person.
I can't believe some people leave the room when the commercials come on. They're missing out on important public service announcements.