Monday, November 30, 2009

WTF Monday - Now With Electricity!

Welcome back to Crazytown! Hope you enjoyed the vacation and didn't kill anyone. Or maim anyone. Pretty much anything that would land in jail.

The grandparents took our children for a night this past weekend, and Slayer and I went out on the town with a bunch of sexy Smurfs. Actually, I drank the Sexy Smurfs, and they had a very high alcohol content, which I discovered when I woke up the next morning with a headache. I'm not a big drinker, but I now have a new favorite drink.

Strike that. I have two favorite drinks. The Sexy Smurf and the Purple Hooter. If you put them together, I bet you'd get a drink that looks like grey sludge, but at least it would have an amusing and pervy name. Personally, I find anything with the words "Smurf" and "Hooter" in it to be freaking hilarious. Am I the only person who feels this way?

We also played a big game of Trivial Pursuit over the break, if by "big" you mean just me and Slayer playing for about two hours because we kept getting these craptastic questions. And I learned never to let my husband cook Thanksgiving dinner.

The question was: What holiday icon was electrified by Thomas Edison in year blah de blah? And I rolled my eyes, thinking this is way too obvious. I mean, the only electrified holiday icon I can think of is the Chrismas tree, right? But I nearly hurt myself when Slayer answered, "The turkey." All I could think of was him standing out in front of the house near the power lines, and this big BZZT! noise, and then him saying, "Honey! The turkey's done! It's raw in the middle, but nice and crispy on the outside."

So now, if you ever meet me in person, you can walk up to me and say, "BZZT!" and watch me giggle uncontrollably.

During that game, we also learned that it's impossible to do a Hannibal Lecter impression with a stuffed up nose, because you end up snerking uncontrollably. Words of wisdom from the Harris household.

I saw Boondock Saints 2 over the weekend. Not as good as the first one, but seeing as the first one is on my list of all time bests, that's not all that surprising.



storyqueen said...

The Harris world is a weird and wild one, indeed.

I think I might have electrified my turkey once in the past....them was good eats, let me tell you.

Happy Monday!!


SlayerOfBees said...

I'm glad I can be a never-ending sopurce of amusement for you, funny-lady. :)

I had to laugh when I heard you scream, "Smurf Me!" across the bar to the bartender. Man, I love a baudy night of dueling pianos...

verification word: lardo


Jamie Eyberg said...

I have never had either of those two drinks, but they sound like fun. Glad you had a good weekend, grandparents rock that way.

SlayerOfBees said...

I know what to call that drink:
A Smurfle Hooter!

Mariah Irvin said...

I will definitely say "BZZT!" next time I see you.

Natalie Whipple said...

I think next year you need to host a contest: Best (and by best I mean craziest) Ways To Cook A Turkey.

Shannon O'Donnell said...

I've never heard the word "snerking" before - I love it!

Fun post. I'm still chuckling! :)

Hayley Lovell said...

Happy Monday (can monday's really be happy though? I don't tihnk they can, especially if you're a high schooler...) but Carrie I have an award for you over at my blog, and I'm glad you also made it through Thanksgiving unscathed.

Anonymous said...

I have to agree with your assessment of BDS 2. It was good, and I liked that they didn't just try to redo the first one, but there were several pieces/parts that didn't work. Tiny T's man and I literally "audibly objected" to the use of Desert mf'ing Eagles. ::face palm::

That said, who DOESN'T love a bug eyed, tatted up Mexican loudly demanding to be given his effing BB gun?

K.C. Shaw said...

I thought you meant you'd seen the Boondock Saints twice this weekend, which seemed pretty obsessive of you, and also how did you find the time in between drinking liquified smurfs (so that's why Gargamel wanted them) and electrocuting turkeys?

Sounds like a fun holiday. :)

PJ Hoover said...

So what was the answer?
And I'd drink anything with a name that had Smurf in it.

CKHB said...

Oooh, excellent, I was hoping for a good review on the Boondock Saints sequel! LOVED the first one.

Lecter with a cold? "Heddo, Clarice."

Cate Gardner said...

Sounds like you had a fantastic holiday. Oh, and I always suspected the Smurfs were drunks.

Sherrie Petersen said...

A Sexy Smurf sounds like a good costume for next Halloween. Either that or the electrified turkey :)

Tiny T said...

Snarf! "Smurf me". :)