Thursday, August 6, 2009

Ninja Fashion 101

You know, I love ninja and all (after all, I'm married to one), but I've got a complaint.

This will probably get me killed. I'm just saying that so that if I suddenly stop posting, you won't think it's because I don't love you. Because really, I do. It's just that ninja are always so touchy about their clothes. Still, I feel it's my patriotic duty, or wifely duty, or maybe I just feel like going on a rant about ninja clothes.

Yeah, it's probably the last one.

Anyway, the thing about ninja clothes is that they're so boring. Sure, I get the whole basic black thing. It's slimming. Oh, and it makes them tough to see in the shadows, but really that's just a secondary benefit. And it also helps for those ninja with poor fashion sense, because really, it would be difficult to take them seriously as a group if they all showed up in clashing pastel gis.

So I don't have a problem with the color palatte, but I do have a problem with the cut of your basic gi. Sure, it allows for ease of movement, but it's just not flattering, and it doesn't offer options based on climate. Personally, I think that there should be capri-gis for secret missions in warmer weather. (Hey, it could be worse; I could ask for the bikigi.) I think that there should be skigis for missions in the Alps, and since they'd be all puffy and down-filled, they'd also work well for training. Because really, don't ninjas deserve to be comfortable while they sneak into your room and take all your socks?

As we know, I'm all about equal rights for ninja. And I'm also a fashion genius. Just ask me.

13 comments:

Kiersten White said...

What about formal occasions? Surely they could make a tuxegi, right?

And I am all about the bikigi. Might be the first one I'd ever wear.

Jamie Eyberg said...

Something tells me a pastel ninja would only bring me to my knees in fits of laughter.

PJ Hoover said...

As I sit here in my gi fro Kung Fu this morning...
are you trying to tell me I don't look smoking hot??? Because I beg to differ.

Stephanie Faris said...

I think a body paint ninja would be sexy. Just paint that ninja outfit on.

Susan R. Mills said...

Pastel ninjas? That would be interesting.

Cate Gardner said...

Well I'm all in black today and I've never felt less like a ninja.

Natalie Whipple said...

I think these are all good options. But I might change my mind if a ninja shows up and puts a sword to my neck.

Fox Lee said...

They could just be naked and slather themselves in motor oil

K.C. Shaw said...

At least with the regular basic-black gis you can identify a ninja as a ninja. Er, if you actually see him at all. Just think if ninja wore ratty old T-shirts and cut-off shorts. And, um, had mullets.

Never mind. I'm frightening myself.

Unknown said...

where can i find a ninja of my very own like carrie did? is there an eharmony site out there? for the ninjas?... ninja harmony?

Anonymous said...

"capri-gis"??? HAHAHAHHAHA!!!! Rock on!

-Mercedes

Tiny T said...

Maybe I should invest in a bikigi. The guys might take me more serious. Totally.

I can see it now. I'd walk in in a bikigi and the guys would fall over. I wouldn't have to lift a finger. Perfect!

I'm just that good.

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