Carrie Harris | Young Adult Author

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Things That Make Me Snarf - Wheel of Fortune Parody

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to this week's Thing That Makes Me Snarf. WARNING: This one contains some seriously objectionable language, enough that it made me question whether I should post it. But it's so bleeping funny that I couldn't resist. Please don't send the ninjas after me.



On a totally unrelated subject: I have a problem. It's an addiction, really, and I've fought through it relentlessly. No twelve step groups exist for this addiction, but they should.

Yarn. I buy way too much yarn.

I have three big bags full of stray yarn, little bits of every color. If I'm not careful, I'll end up being one of those granny ladies who stops random people on the street and gives them doilies. Because that happens all the time, doesn't it?

But luckily, I have Hanna Banana. Hanna saw pictures of little crocheted ninjas and zombies and immediately thought of me. She sent me an email. Hanna deserves one of those little Bestish Friendish badges that I don't know how to make because I am dumb. Anyway, I immediately went out to buy the book.

And lo, it is fabulous. I shall post pictures of my little ninjas and zombies and vampires as soon as they are done. I shall use up my superfluous yarn so that I can clean out the office and hang a bunch of zombie art on the walls. And then, the world will be right again.

So... um... does anyone want a day-glo yellow ninja? Or a fuzzy pink trojan? (Get your mind out of the gutter, people. I'm talking about the warrior, not the prophylactic.) Because that's the only problem with this plan: using up all the yarn is going to result in a series of figures that look like they were crocheted by a granny lady on PCP.

17 comments:

Keri Mikulski said...

My mom has the yarn addiction too.. Me - books. :)

Scillius Maximus said...

1 Kunoichi and 1 Ninja please :-)

Great Snarf video this week. I didn't even get the Lysol out.

Jamie Eyberg said...

I haven't watched that show in years. Since when did Vanna not have to turn the letters over?

K.C. Shaw said...

Okay, that book sounds completely awesome. I may have to check it out, not that I'm a very good knitter.

I have a problem similar to your yarn addiction, but far far far far worse. I can't stop buying wool (and other fibers) to spin into yarn. Which takes forever. And which I never have time for anymore. So I have big bags of wool (and other fibers) stuffed everywhere, surrounded by guilt.

Hanna Banana said...

I absolutely cannot WAIT to see how they turn out!!

I found a pattern for a hat that looks like a cross between an afro and clown hair. Now all of my kids and THEIR friends want one.

Kelly said...

That video was funny! I guessed it in under a 1 1/2 minutes :0).
Can't wait to see your colorful ninja dudes made of yarn! You may have to make a movie short with them!

adrienne said...

Funny, but I had to stop the video before the answer was up - the kids haven't left yet...
Have you seen that Yoplait ad where the woman knits everything, including a basketball jersey for her husband?

Natalie L. Sin said...

Aww, I didn't get to hear them say "motherfucker."

Suzanne Casamento said...

I SO want a yarn zombie or trojan.
I will put him on my desk and he will inspire me to write great things. Please??? Pretty pleeeease???

beth said...

Ha--I don't buy yarn, but I do buy thread (I sew...well, can I say I sew if I haven't done it in 2+ years? I'll just say I LIKE to sew....)

Hanna Banana said...

Can I order a fuzzy pink trojan? Then I will put it on my desk and when asked what it is, I will say "Why, it is a fuzzy pink trojan!"

Mariah Irvin said...

I wished the video would keep going, just so I could send the ninjas on you!

Maybe your Bestish Friendish badges should be the crocheted ninjas and zombies. Who doesn't need one of those?

Anne Spollen said...

Bad yarn joke, but I know you guys will still read it:

A woman is knitting as she drives (which is totally unsafe, and I don't advocate it). Pretty soon, her speed has crept all the way up to 95 mph--and she passes a parked police car. The car gives chase. Officer Bob turns on his siren, but the woman, oblivious, doesn't notice him. Finally, he pulls up alongside her car and yells, "Pull over! PULL OVER!"



She looks at him, looks at her knitting, and yells--



"NO! It's a CARDIGAN!"


(You were warned)

Brenda said...

This is sad, but I'm no good at Wheel of Fortune...but I got this one in like no time! What does that say about me...grin...

Scillius Maximus said...

Just to let you know Anne Spollen:

Ninja's have been dispatched to raid your sock drawer.

Christina Farley said...

Yarn? Too funny. So you like to crochet. I do too. But lately I haven't found the time.

My addiction is pencils. I LOVE them. Especially the cute ones!

Tiny T said...

Aww... yarn... :) I may have to bring some yarn up with me one of these times and we can make a whole semi secret ninja gang with kunoichi included :D

 


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