So, without further ado, I bring you the Funniest Creature Championships. Over the next month, YOU are going to choose the snarfiest creature out there from a list of eight highly qualified finalists. I even have a highly scientific Excel spreadsheet.
Here's how it works. I'll give you two creatures and a brief rundown on why I find them hilarious. You vote in the comments. The one that gets the most votes moves on to the next bracket. Awe-inspiring science, isn't it?
First, we've got the vampire bracket. I think you all know what's coming.
CREATURE 1: The Cullens
Funny for one very simple reason--their powers are super strength, super speed, and pretty sparkles. They inspire cartoons like THIS.
In short, any creature that makes me want to prance around the room going "Sparkle sparkle sparkle!!!" and doing jazz hands is FUNNY. And the Cullens make me want to do that.
CREATURE 2: The Roller Skating Vampire
Imagine this: you've just learned that bloodsuckers are invading your town. You are an idiot and decide to walk around at night anyway, just for kicks. And then...gasp! You see a vampire in a darkened alley! It roller skates right toward you with its claws outstretched, and it's a cross dresser, and--
Wait a minute. Roller skates? Cross dresser?
The movie is Fright Night 2, which is one of the best films EVER. And when I say that, I really mean that it's so horrible that it's magnificent.
So. Which do you find funnier? The Cullens or the rollerskating vampire? I HAZ 2 KNO. And make sure to tune in again tomorrow to see the mutant pictures I've found of my favorite celebrities. Too freaking funny.